FIFTY SPLASHES OF GREY!

I may be extremely outgoing but believe me when I reinforce that I am the least spontaneous person you'll ever meet. I guess that's why I can’t help but wonder if that’s why I compartmentalize so well. Everything is neatly packed into silos before I ever start tending the farm. I'm not sure if anyone can relate; but for me, everything is very black and white. Occasionally, a splash of grey may creep in. Unfortunately, a sexy fella named Christen is no where to be found when it does show up!

Oh, the childhood memories I have. What a great place to live!
TAKEN: JANUARY 23rd, 2014

For a reason (beyond silly) I got 'stuck' this past Friday. I guess you could say I got stuck in the black and white of it all.

The more I looked, the worse it got. I simply couldn't find, yet desperately needed, about fifty splashes of grey. 

Finally, filled with angst and totally exasperated, I bundled myself up and went for a walk. Half an hour later, here's where I ended up.

Coming down the hill I couldn't help but notice the vibrant leaves that had held on and made it until the January thaw. The closer I got, the more the burst of red stayed with me. When I hit the bottom of the hill, it was like my life flashed in front of me. 

I pictured Kelvin Grove in it's original state. I imagined the gang of us teens swimming to the famous sandbar (that the RMS Seguin got hung up on during it's last trek up the Muskoka River). My eyes and thoughts moved to the the far right where our wedding party stood to have our formal pictures taken. Then, they shifted to the far left and to my quirky sidekick. I imagined he and I eating lunch at our favourite picnic table more than a decade ago. Oh, the Canada Day fireworks with the kids, the risky swimming at the base of the falls when I was a kid... The pond hockey surface. Then, it hit me.

The boulder in front of me is really nothing but a pebble. I'm not lost in the forest, because a forest is very deeply rooted and unable to change. I see the one tree in front of me as a survivor. Some days, I am sure it sucks that it doesn't have other trees around it to talk to but let's face it... Trees don't talk.! (Well, maybe if they are on a really great acid trip but not in everyday life, which is my very round about point.)

At the end of the day, life really is very black and white. Yesterday only proved to me that it's each and everyone of our jobs to find the colours, embrace them...and stay the hell out of the forest.

It's just as silly and simple as that!

I BLEED BASKETBALL!

A couple of summers ago, we had an Africa hot early pre-summer Muskoka heatwave. It wasn't the elevated temps that made it memorable, it was that our next door neighbours were expecting their first child. I was living at the cottage and doing the ten mile commute, while Goob worked and lived at the house in town. At home for the day (late in her pregnancy) I innocently asked her if he was behaving.

GOOB n' ME. Love that he's rockin' his classic Raptors Jersey!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 2014

“Other than the weekend pick-up games of basketball at 2am in the morning, I wouldn't think anyone was over there,” she said. 

"I can sleep through loud music” she continued. “It's the thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk of the ball on the driveway... It's like a slow drip to the forehead when you can't sleep!.” 

Naturally, I apologized.  Told her I’d speak to him and without hesitation, gave her very some very sound advice; if it happened again, simply go to the nearest open window and yell... "GOOB! PUT THE BALL AWAY AND GO THE F*CK TO BED!!” 

Taking the 'unconventional parenting approach' made no matter. The competitive, testosterone filled young men (we totally consider family) let it happen again. The net was taken down the next day and eventually disposed of. That said, though a childhood relic was put to pasture, we've never waivered  as a die hard basketball family.

I am officially going on the record that I am NOT a hockey fan. If you want to know why I don't 'bleed blue' the answer is simple. I bleed basketball. At this particular moment, I just can't confidently attach a colour to my passion. You see, not only can the Raps NOT decide on a logo; they seem to be a tad confused on which uniform colour to wear. Makes no matter. My philosophy has been deeply routed and totally ingrained since my children were small. 

GO RAPS GO... #WE THE NORTH!

WE’VE BEEN ROBBED…. AGAIN!

The picture I am sharing today was the one the Bank took in December of 1999 when they appraised our cottage on Orillia Lake. All these years later, though the landscape has changed, that photo is still pinned on the fridge with a magnet. As you know, this neat little haven has served us well as a family.

That very first winter we spent many enjoyable days there, yet didn’t spend the night until the snow was totally melted in the spring of 2000. About three weekends into full-time enjoyment, we arrived that Friday night to the realization that we’d been robbed. I remember feeling a tad scared, not to mention really fecking mad! How the hell could someone be so self-serving?

The structure remains the same... But the landscape has definitely changed.
TAKEN: DECEMBER 1999 

Well, this week I discovered we’ve been robbed out there again. This time, by Hydro One!

As you all know, I obsess about my Lakeland Power bill for the home in town. That said, all these years later, I have never really bothered to take a good look at the cottage hydro bill. 

So, when I opened the current bill for $158.36, I thought my Christmas cottage romp was generally pretty affordable. Then, I started to think about it; I only used three small 110 volt heaters and barbecued (mostly) because it was so mild. It was then, I decided to really look at it. The bill was for the last three month billing period,  ending December 25th.

Last fall, in the 90 billing days, I used a total $14.03 in hydro and none of it was in On-Peak time. Keeping the HST,  their debt retirement out and grabbing my bullshit Clean Energy Benefit... 897% of my bill was delivery!

I'm an open minded gal but nothing pisses me off more than getting truly screwed and no one buying me a drink first. Wait, could that be what my Clean Energy Benefit credit is for? A drink, so that I can get up the nerve to pay my bill? Hell, the value of that is so small, I wouldn't even be able to fill a thimble with rubbing alcohol. Whatever, all I can do at this point is express my frustration. So here's a visual...

All you need to do is imagine me cheering. Imagine that you can hear my voice enthusiastically saying "I'm your number one fan Hydro One... I'm your number ONE fan Hydro One..." really loudly and over and over again.

Now, picture me waving my extremely outstretch middle finger, whilst gloriously chanting it!

Ya Gotta Laugh About It...!!

CAN I GET A ROUND OF APPLAUSE?

Thank God it’s Friday, because I’ve had a very emotional week!

So, to always strive to remain self-aware, I'll admit that I know it’s the accumulation of a number of different things. The fact that I can both realize and admit that, helps me understand why I broke down and cried right before I left to come home this afternoon.

Since my feet hit the floor Monday, I've been on this roller coaster ride. A ride that has had me mired in the feelings of fear, shock, elation, sorrow, frustration, angst, happiness, laughter and love. I was telling Pete this afternoon about my deeply rooted quirks. I could see by the look on his face that he wasn't sure if he should think I’m brilliant, or bat shit crazy. As a true Entrepreneur, I can assure you that I am a solid balance of both.

Like most people, I have triggers. It's just that this week decided to serve each and every one of them suckers daily. (All-inclusive and as a three meal a day 'buffet'.) As a result, each day moved several different emotions within me depending on what that buffet was serving. Because I've conditioned myself with internalizing, my tears were just simply a release telling me I made it.

So I have to find my glass half full.... Let me see. It can’t be the wine I’m sipping, because my glass is more than half empty. It can’t be that the Raptors play tonight, because they always make my glass overflow. I think my moment will come tomorrow afternoon; when I strap on my snowshoes, grab the pups and trek over to the eighth tee on the golf course.

If I position myself right...?
My voice will go over the 8th green, right up the 9th fairway, then into the curling rink!
TAKEN FEBRUARY 20th, 2012

It will be there, that I scream extreme expletives at every single one of the emotions I have felt this week. If I do it right, one of two things will happen; I’ll either lose my voice, or I’ll get a round of applause from everyone at the curling rink participating in this weekends bonspiel.

She's a no-brainer. Ya gotta shoot for the round of applause… Right?

Because most people would give up once they've lost their voice. 

That's my glass half full.... I'm truly grateful that I'm not like "most" people!

HERE's THE SCOOP...

PEEPS... Meet my winter BFF!
TAKEN: JANUARY 10th, 2015

As I mentioned in my last post, this past week has been brutal for l'il ole me in the snow removal department. 

When I woke up yesterday morning, the plow had passed twice in the night and the snow bank at the end of the driveway was more than four feet high. Armed with my trusty scoop, I bundled up and headed out. When I got out there, I was simply gobsmacked. 

NEVER, in all the years that we’ve owned this home, have I ever had to tackle a bank that big. The hardest part was that I literally had no place to put the friggin' crap.

So, I ended up having to cart all of it across the street and load it into the ditch. The worst part was, because there had been so very much accumulation, I had to make some major scoop trails in order to make room for the snow I was moving. Suffice is to say, by the time I finished yesterday, my arms felt like they each weighed a ton.

After a hot bath last night, I woke up this morning feeling like a million bucks!

Got the laundry done, groceries done and had a solid plan to build the annual 'dog trails' with my snowshoes before I put supper on. Well, let me tell ya something. Once I got going, that million dollar feeling I woke up to this morn, turned into a $1.99 K-Mart blue light special!

About 45 minutes in I started to head down the hill toward the railway tracks. Thirty feet in from the top of the yard, I hit (what felt like) an air pocket. Down I went. The worst part was I was facing downhill and the snow had me immobilized. I was totally FUBAR’d!

I called for my husband, nothing.  My arms felt so heavy I could barely support myself. I kept stepping on my snowshoes and I could feel the muscles in my legs straining. With three dogs trying to help by jumping on my back, I just let all my muscles relax and started laughing. I am very pleased to report, that I eventually regrouped and got myself back up the hill.

You’d have to think that the worst part of the last couple of days was that my legs now feel as heavy as my arms; that’s not it. The worst part is that three neighbours offered to loan me their snowblower yesterday morning as I dug out of that stinking snowbank. 

My response to all of them? “No thank you, I really do like the exercise...” 

The worst part... is that I am a complete and total idiot for not saying ... "Yes, please!" 

I suck!

I'M WITH STUPID...!

Does anyone remember those cheezy ‘I’m with Stupid' t-shirts? They had a big finger that was pointing at the person walking beside them; classic 1970’s. Well, you may not be able to see it by the picture I am posting but my hubby and I are both wearing those shirts. Yup, and the arrows are pointing directly upward toward our chins!

YUP... We're as stupid as they come!
TAKEN: NOVEMBER 19th, 2014

After more than three solid hours of snow shoveling today (for the umpteenth day in a row) I have to second guess the next couple of months. Yes-sir-reeee, we could very well be the two stupidest people on the face of the earth!!

Matter a fact, that is a camera hanging around my neck, which is feeling very much like a noose today!

I was so excited for my buddy B over the holidays. He surprised the very beautiful T with an amazing trip to Cancun as a Christmas gift. She’s so excited and I am really excited for them. When declining his invitation to join them, I was confident I could cope in their absence mid February (as it was raining outside as we sipped our Christmas Cheer) on the 28th of December. Afterall, winter had yet to arrive.

Flash forward to the last couple of days in Muskoka...

We're only a week in and today is the first day I regret telling my husband that the snow blower fund could be utilized elsewhere. For crying out loud people... With it being -35C yesterday with the wind chill, and walk to the office today in blowing snow, we seriously need our heads examined!

With another foot of the white stuff expected to fall overnight, I only have two words for all of you (as I look at us with our tanned skin wearing very little clothing) TRIP CENTRAL!

Can February get here fast enough? Nope, definitely not for this cat!

I'M GETTIN' BACK OUT THERE!

While perusing my social media outlets over the holidays, I came across a post. A post, that almost a week later, still stands out. There wasn't a graphic but the overall message was very simple. In 2015 ask someone to take your picture. Put yourself out there! 

ANNIE n' ME in the driveway!
(Photo Credit? NOT ME!)
TAKEN: JANUARY 2nd, 2015

Though the context is about taking selfies, the last thought has burrowed itself my cranium. After much reflection, I realize that I had so much to accomplish in 2014, that I’ve truly isolated myself of who I really am; a full blown extrovert. 

With that admission on the table, you'll be equally surprised to learn that in the past thirteen months (electronic friends excluded) I have spent 90% of my time either alone or with family/pups. Don't get me wrong, I've built something truly amazing but this holiday season made me realize that I've been missing interacting face to face with others for far too long. It's time to 'put myself out there'.

I'm not afraid of what the upcoming year will bring. I enjoy meeting new people, as well as establishing new Business associates. As an extrovert, both come quite naturally. With my lessons learned file folders in tow, I know I'll need to be very careful and extremely selective in whom I trust. With my mind made up, I am hopeful.

As we all know from experience, when any of us sustain any big change, friends and inner circles ultimately shift. Which always bring us back to those handful of people that were meant to be in our lives forever.  For which, I will always be both respectful & grateful.

It's their unconditional belief in me that gives me this strength to continue to build. They know who they are, so I'd like to thank them.

Thank you, for simply being 'YOU'... And loving me, for simply being 'ME'.

HAT’s MINE YA BONEHEAD!

Holy Snow Squalls Batman!

As predicted, the land, as far as the eye can see, is a blanket of ‘Frosty the Snowman’ snow. That wonderful type of precipitation, that is all light and fluffy and perfect. The very kind of snow we usually get right before Christmas. Once again, someone needs to check Mother Nature's meds. (Because that perimenopausal bitch is definitely crazy outta whack, not to mention off her rocker. AGAIN!)

It's my hat.
No, it's my hat.
NO... It's my hubby's hat!
TAKEN: JANUARY 1st,  2015

I’m kidding. I don’t mind it. Truth is, I love it.

Matter a fact, once the plow passed a second time this morning, we headed out to clear the freshly fallen snow. 

Not only is it very pretty out there (and the fresh air exhilarating) but today’s snow makes me smile. It signifies that I made it through those awful six weeks after I am forced to "fall back". 

As my picture illustrates, like every year, it’s been a bit of a tug of war. However, with the help of a jolt of vitamin D and the ongoing task of keeping my young Anna Lee out of mischief, I made it.

Actually, take a good look at the picture. I have an ever so slight chance of making it until the Lakes open, without the loss of a lot of my shoes and other personal belongings. She's absolutely and unequivocally stolen my heart, let's hope her razor shape teeth can equally respect my crap. Ya Gotta Laugh About It...!

Happy New Year everyone. All the best in 2015 & thank you again for reading.

MY PERFECT ICED COFFEE

Well, it went from sunshine to sub-zero in a flash... Via a flash-freeze that is!

A couple of days ago, I was bragging about how I hardly needed a coat, then this morning I awoke to the mercury dipping to a chilly -20C. I’d like to be able to report late January Florida temps here at Orillia Lake, instead Muskoka has snow squall warnings on the horizon. As a result, I'm headed home at dawn.

Imagine witnessing ice being made... and not via my ice maker!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 30th, 2014

It’s been an interesting day for me. It’s the first time that I've actually been here to witness the ice form and winter take shape. Yikes, does it ever happen fast!

When I was up in the night stoking the fire, I noticed patches of ice forming in the moonlight. By dawn, I could hear a distinct crackle of the flowing agua and the newly formed ice arguing... Like an old married couple.

Bundled up (in the amazing company of my one daily cup of coffee) I cautiously watched the pups on the hill out front and listened. Not to the pups silly but to the immediate climate changing around me. Then I realized how great it felt to be here all alone. After being here for almost a week, I feel normal again. 

To quote a very wise man, "one person's normal, is another person's absurdity" and he's exactly right. Who the hell would think that standing outside, in sub-zero weather, listening to ice freeze, was normal?

Apparently, both he and I do. Because I just emailed him this picture!

SHARING A SUNNY SUNDAY

If this year produced the quietest Christmas eve and day of my life, then Boxing Day definitely rated as one of my busiest. I posted, showered, packed, and landed at the cottage all by mid-afternoon. It was so mild outside that within the hour I was shuffling about the woodstove in my really ugly and over-sized slippers. I may have been tired... but I was certainly glad to be back.

I hadn't intended on coming in Boxing Day but the long range forecast (not that the weatherman is ever right) gave me the feeling, that if it did in fact drop to -10C, getting it heated and the beds cozy for New Years Eve would be a much bigger task. So, I figured I'd stay here, enjoy my three days, then make the ten minute trek home until Spring.

This is what I call... Lake Effect SUN!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 28th, 2014

Well, today's is my third day and I did in fact head home. I quickly showered, picked up more supplies and returned. I've landed back out here until the cold, or my lack of Mott’s Clamato juice, eventually ushers me home.

As I was carrying my bags down the stairs, I stopped in my tracks and rummage through my coat for my phone. As I stood in this moment it felt like the 28th of September, not the 28th of December as the calendar reminds. It was a beautiful sunny Sunday and I immediately knew I wanted to share it with you.

As I look past the holidays, the one thing I do know for sure, is that I have some solid personal goals and serious hopes for the new year. Just so happens that this little piece of not so flat land, is my truly amazing glue that will hold all of it together.

What more can a girl ask for?

HAD A DRINK WITH MY DAD

What can I say? All of that hype and today is the infamous Canadian Boxing Day.

 I just saw a neat American cartoon that read: When I was little I always thought Boxing Day was a holiday when you piled up all the boxes from Christmas presents, set them on fire, and danced around the flames. I also wondered why we never celebrated Boxing Day! Good One!!

My Dad loved the holidays. His steadfast sense of family, the food, the cheer. More food, more cheer. Anyway, I know that I’ve shared stories about my quest to keep finding those silly Petro Canada Olympic glasses. Just so we’re clear, my obsession is exactly that, which is ongoing and very real. (Read: HEY DAD... GUESS WHAT I FOUND?)

CHEERS... I LOVE YOU DAD.
TAKEN: DECEMBER 25th, 2014

Just as I would if he were still alive, yesterday, he and I shared a Christmas drink.

As I was sitting there staring out the window & sipping, I wondered if he’d have any solid words of advice for what I have going on in my life right now. 

I envisioned him sitting on the sofa next to me. He’d listen to what I had to say and be non-judgmental. Then, I suspect he’d rattle the ice cubes in his glass signifying it was empty and tell me everything would be fine.

You want to know something? I don't think my father ever once asked me for a second drink. He’d just rattle the ice in his glass letting me know that his first one was finished. That was his cue. Life is funny like that; how certain moments ignite specific memories.

You want to know what else is funny about life? That it's bat shit crazy hard, right up until the moment it isn't.

SO spark up them boxes, control the flames and have a really great day!

IT's CHRISTMAS EVE...

It's Christmas Eve, so naturally my quirky sidekick and I chatted this morning.

He was pleased to report that he'd accomplished all of his holiday shopping, and I was excited (that he was excited) about his countdown to putting on the fat red suit for his two little girls. The only thing that I had to report, was that he had delightfully interrupted a really sappy Christmas movie that I had stayed in bed late watching.

GOOB & Jukebox rockin' a Christmas hug yesterday for their Momma!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 23rd, 2014

This is the first year that I can actually admit that because our children are now young adults, today has truly felt like any other day for me. 

I’m not sure if it’s that the boys and I took a road trip yesterday, or because I didn’t have my daughter reminding me (every single day) of every single thing on her wish list; I suspect it's simply a combination of both.

Gone are the traditions for the young and excited, ushered in are the making of their own individual traditions. This year, it won’t be me that entertains tonight, it will be Goob and his room mates that open their home to greet family and friends.

Gone is the anticipation of trekking to grandparents to exchange gifts, ushered in was the formal gifting of money. I am okay with all of that, as it truly is the most practical thing to do for them. I’ve always tithed at Christmas. However, the needs at home this year are so much so, that what normally would have gone into the community, have been invested to those equally in need (...that just happen to possess my DNA). 

I am sitting here typing and thinking of the way we use to spend Christmas Eve and that those days are officially gone. I was struggling with that so much this morning, that I had a mini meltdown and uncontrollably burst into tears. My personal Jukebox immediately opened his arms and wrapped them tightly around me. 

"I love you Mom..." was what he whispered in my ear. He just held me and let me cry. Words cannot express just how grateful I was. In this Xmas instance, receiving was far better than my giving. 

What is it that I am always saying on this silly little blog? That you can't stop change, only manage it. Well, today was a really big reminder of that specific wee ditty for yours truly!

Merry Christmas Eve to all… And to all a good night. 

DREAMBOAT ANNIE ~ ROCK STAR!

Well, it’s that time of year again. When everyone breaks for Christmas and I start obsessing about the weather. Not in an 'I'm Dreaming of White Christmas' kind of way, matter a fact the opposite. You see, though purchased in 1999 - in 2007 we started a fun cottage tradition.  We’d pack up the toboggans, strap on the snowshoes, and head into Orillia Lake for a few days to ring in the New Year. 

Puddin' showing Annie the view. PRICELESS!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 21st, 2014

I’ll gently remind everyone that New Years Eve 2013 dipped to a chilly -21C outside, so our cottage trek was not even remotely an option. The year previous, we were in South Carolina. So suffice is to say that I've had my fingers, toes, as well as my eyes crossed since the beginning of December!

Optimistic that it's going to actually happen this year, I headed in with the pups yesterday. I was a tad worried how itty bitty Annie would make out but figured worst case scenario, I'd have to pick her up and carry her. Not even close. She was a compete and total ROCK STAR. That said, I have Shelly to thank that her little legs didn't have near the expected trek to travel.

You see, I was pleasantly surprised and exceptionally fortunate that my BCF (Best Cottage Friend) has kept our private cottage road open. When I saw her brand spankin' new truck parked at the top of our first hill I was thrilled. (Not gonna lie, that truck keeping our road open just may rate sexier than she and I scooting around the Lake on her three-seater SeaDoo!) 

Anyway, as my title infers, yesterday was my dreamboat Annie's very first cottage adventure. She's doing well. Just like me, she's very open minded and curious about trying new things. Yesterday, I especially loved watching how the other two pups made sure she was safe at all times. They have truly embraced her and are always scurrying to make sure she's okay and content. After all, that's what best cottage girlfriends are for right? Right!

Uh-oh, gotta run. Annie is pulling the bows off the presents and the shims out of my crooked Christmas tree. It's not good. Matter a fact I can read the headline now…

Crazy Dog Lady Arrested... As Crooked Tree Pummels Innocent Pup!

Innocent my FAT albeit friggin’ festive ass!

MY PERSONAL STANDING OVATION

Who's a doormat? Not this cat!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 19th, 2014

I  have to admit when my feet hit the floor last Friday morning I knew it was going to be a great day. As I've shared before, when I know that I am going to have a truly memorable day, I snap a selfie.  Though I had a important one o'clock, that wasn't it. Sorry Pete.

You see, the night before, I pulled up my big girl panties until they hit my armpits, then made some very hard personal decisions. When I woke Friday morning and still felt the same way as the night before, I knew my day would be a memorable one. I'd pulled a plug; a plug that would never allow myself to be a specific persons door mat EVER again!

Locked and loaded I started my trek to my one o'clock. I always shuffle the five hundred plus songs on my phone and I always sing aloud when I walk. That said, I know I only have four good notes, so I am careful who hears my very gregarious performances.  I do keep the volume on my phone low enough that I can hear if I'm in tune but when I hear the neighbourhood dogs howling as I walk by, I immediately know I need to kick my personal volume down a notch. Well, for the very first time Friday, I got caught.

As I was headed down a lane near our local hospital, one of my very favourite songs was selected by the shuffle. Lost in the lyrics and music of Anna Nalicks - Just Breathe, I was totally engaged in the moment. To get the breathing right takes commitment, so I was 100% in. I didn't see any Ambulances or Police cars under the Emergency Room entrance, so I kept my tone and volume consistent.

As I landed at the end of the lane, I instantly (peripherally) felt a woman in my song space. As I quickly pulled my earbuds out, she began to clap. I was in shock. I immediately apologized. "I usually put my vocal cords on mute when I come upon someone" I said, "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize" she said. "It was really good...!"

 To which I immediately and playfully started to root thought my laptop bag in search of my wallet. "I pay ten bucks for compliments like that" I said. We both burst out laughing and I continued on my trek.I am pleased to report that I sang aloud the rest of the way to my one o'clock.

YUP... Friday was truly a great day!

O CROOKED TREE! O CROOKED TREE!

About a week ago I blogged about struggling to put up the Christmas tree. The bigger shock was that I was generally proud that I didn’t snap during the process. As you all know, I’m not an over the top ‘Tis the Season kinda gal. However, because I’ve had a really great splash of sun and I am still wearing a perma-smile, I decided to go on the record admitting that I'm a tad more tolerant of the upcoming festive season than in previous years.

Then, all hell broke loose. I was venting to my friends on Facebook about this crooked tree I bought. Hang on, let me grab the post. Here you go. It read: OK. I bought the Christmas Tree from HELL. If it falls over one more time, I'm gonna go all Grinch on it and fire it into the gully, never to be rescued or decorated ever again! ...This concludes my Christmas rant at this time. Cheers! Suffice is to say it engaged us in a plethora of comical rant of comments. 

Love may make our house a home....
But this crooked tree is making it hard for me to not turn it into firewood!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 18th, 2014

Well, guess what? 

The stinkin' thing fell over again! 

Did I go all Grinch on it and pitch it in the gully? Nooooo.

Why? Because it's Christmas dang nab it; and I love the look of a Christmas tree all lit up and pretty after dark. 

Anyway, as I was explaining my plight to an electronic friend today, I immediately got a smart ass email asking why I didn't secure it after the second time it fell? Aside from the fact that this specific lad has been crossed off my Christmas card list, here's the deal...

I'm a pretty bright girl and this is a tree. Isn't the normal assumption that they tend grow relatively straight and not on an 80 degree angle? Exactly! I simply figured it was my incompetence rather than a genetic imperfection that was making this puppy fall. At the end of the day, I think I have gravity under control.

What the hell... it's not rocket science is it? Of course not. If it were, I'd be applying Polysporin to the exposed knots on the trunk of the tree and grabbing a set of booster cables to give those Christmas lights an extra boost.

Don't ask... Just smile. Trust me on this one.