TWENTY REASONS WHY

My husband went back to work yesterday, so I will be flying solo around the house until Friday night. 

It goes without saying that sitting around all day was out of the question, so my first self assigned task was to productively purge my clothing dressers, closets, and totes; you read that right, plural.

What started a three-pile exercise (out to the cottage, neatly bagged for donation, and the third for disposal) resulted in a day that proved to be cathartic as well as seriously eye opening. So much so that it genuinely resulted in me motivating myself for change. 

Long term readers may remember it was ten years ago on this exact day that I decided I was going to get back in shape, and the ‘quest for my waist' began. 

I hadn’t been through menopause back then, so I suspect my results a decade later will take an altered approach, not to mention considerably more work. 

As a goal-oriented person, I knew I would need a way to focus. So, my personal target is to wear this wee ditty around the pool, for my birthday trip to Las Vegas in April.

These beautiful colours were last worn by me in Miami in 2018.
 I am truly hoping to end our five year hiatus!
TAKEN: JANUARY 4th, 2023

Now before you start rolling your eyes, know that I am not doing this out of vanity. 

Rather you should know that I am truly uncomfortable in my skin and need to make a change. Purging my clothes just gave me the motivation I needed. This over weight just simply must go!

...Now, I’m not talking 200 pounds. 

I am looking to lose the extra twenty pounds that have slowly crept back and are comfortably squatting on the midsection of my body. No matter what I do, those suckers seem to want to stay indefinitely. 

I'm not joking. They are stuck to me as comfortably as Jeffrey Dahmer was living in his grandmothers' basement,  and today I decided that was no longer an option.

How serious am I? 

When I finished my chores, I hung her up in my dressing room next to my mirror, where I will see here every time I enter the room to get dressed. As extra reinforcement, I have taped a picture of her on the front of the fridge. 

Oh, and just to be clear. This isn't a 2023 resolution. It is a much needed personal solution using a colourful (albeit memorable) two piece object as a healthy reminder of my task at hand. 

Wish me luck!

T IS FOR TOXIC

#meanpeoplesuck

I am sure you’ll agree that there is always one. 

One person you've never really suspected but kind of thought maybe, wanted to put a pillow over your face at your lowest point, hoping they could do you in. 

I should disclose that there had been instances previously, but they had always ended in my having a 'water off a duck's back' attitude. (Oh, it's just so and so... being so and so.)

As you know, this last week I’ve been a mess. I struggled with my letter S because of the sheer emotion of creating the collage and writing the few words I could muster.

Then, out of the blue, I got a series of personal messages from 'so and so,' asking questions about what was happening around me and what had unfurled the night previous.  In the end, I believe this person thought she had information that would shock and devastate me more than I already was.

After she delivered her dramatic zinger, she gave me a thumbs up followed by hug emoji. My reply was swift like a razor blade. 

“Don’t hug me,” I said. “You knew exactly what you were doing!”

Deleted, blocked, gone in a social media instant. Screw enabling her any longer. 

That, my friends, is the only way to deal with TOXIC troublemakers...Especially when you're unable to punch them in the face in person!!

Ahhhh, typing that last sentence out felt great. It processed closure for me.

Thanks for listening.

O IS FOR OOOOPS

I don’t know about you, but I've a very challenging and volatile relationship with my aging metabolism. Trust me when I admit that I wasn't even remotely prepared for what midlife did to a woman’s body but will go on the record stating this: It friggin’ sucks!

Let's face it. I only know a very small handful of women my age that are happy with their shape and my theory is simple. Menopause blows, big time. 

I suppose I could spend the money on liposuction to rid the evidence that I gave birth to 3 children, instead I wear clothes that are generally flattering to my shape, while spending my savings on travelling as much as my work life allows. This year, with COVID19 in full force, not so much. 

You see, over the last 6 or seven months I’ve put on some ‘stress weight’ that I am having a tough time shaking. It’s not the type of stress I experienced a decade years ago, more the ‘there aren’t enough hours in a day’ stress; which ultimately opens the door for bad food choices, creating even more stress.

I hate that I'm heavier than I care to be. That said, I guess I could have chosen, overweight or obese as my word, instead I chose OOOOPS.

Frankly because I feel I am simply on a detour, meaning I have not arrived at my final destination.

Thanks for listening ~ Rhondi

My quest for my waist once again continues!
TAKEN: DECEMBER 3rd, 2019
MAZATLAN, MEXICO

I IS FOR IRRATIONAL

No other words required!!
(Image via: scmp.com)

Q IS FOR QUOTES

My 2019 April A-Z Blogging Challenge posts will primarily consist of words & corresponding quotes.
(...With the odd opinionated electronic journal entry inserted to keep you on your toes.)

P IS FOR PRIVATE

My 2019 April A-Z Blogging Challenge posts will primarily consist of words & corresponding quotes.
(...With the odd opinionated electronic journal entry inserted to keep you on your toes.)

FOR THE RECORD

My motto in life?
Kill the assholes with kindness!
TAKEN: April 1978

I don’t care who you are, when your feelings have been deeply hurt, there is nothing more exasperating than being told you’re overreacting.

As a matter a fact,  I am a firm believer that the only reason they play that super stupid lame card, is because on the surface they want the brutally honest conversation to stop. Simply because they've realized, deep inside, what they did to you was wrong and you are speaking an absolute truth.

Have I ever mentioned the fact that I’m often teased in passing that my cheerfulness is silly, or labelled as something it isn't?

Part of me thinks those being aggressively passive and judgmental about my very fashionable rose coloured glasses are that way because they've never met anyone like me; which is someone that would rather instill confidence over conflict.

I am honest when I write that I wake every day in hopes of making someone else’s day better. I think that may have  something to do with my being bullied as a child, in that I learned very early that my extroversion categorically opened my mind and spirit to a commitment to never stop setting goals nor letting others tell you that you didn't have great worth.

As a result, I have always worked to give my best. Which may read an an oxymoron seeing as over the years I've written here that the best I could do was barely crawl out of bed...Yet even then, I always did it and smiled.

As I process all of this, my biggest discovery this post is that once you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. Which is the realization I had yesterday, and is naturally attached to what feels to be a bit like a broken heart.

Glass half full? It isn’t the first time my ticker has been less than stellar, and it most certainly won’t be the last. As a matter a fact, a wise and amazing friend sent me a text message this afternoon that read… ”Remember you are worthy of all the great & amazing things in life.”

She continued with, "these things and people far surpass the other people & events around you that can create inconvenience & negativity.”

To which I replied: "Agreed... The loss is theirs & bigger than they can ever imagine!”

Once again, I have my big girl panties pulled up and I am moving onward & upward.

Thanks again for reading.

YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS?!

My breaking the news we are staying in town.
TAKEN: AUGUST 10th, 2018

After a really great weather weekend in Muskoka, I am in the process of working toward getting my pups off suicide watch, as I've moved back into town with them for the week.

You see, with my commitment to doing yoga twice a week (and the days getting shorter) this last round of heat last week made it apparent that I have lost my stride. Time to re-calibrate on all levels and get some much needed deep and uninterrupted sleep.

I know it may sound exciting to own a home and a cottage that are a fifteen minute drive apart, and 90% of the time it is. The other 10% of the time you worry how you’ll get the lawn at home mowed, floors washed, not to mention the very large doghouse properly cleaned that three very hairy canines rule from Monday to Friday. For me, the latter is nerve-wracking and a burden.

I honestly make lists to find an ease to the order but it never fails, items are missed and unexpected things take priority which frustrates me to no end. If I am being honest, I don’t think my frustration is due to being unorganized, more because I am a tad embarrassed to admit that the happiness of three dogs rule my day to day life.

At the end of it all, they are like any over stimulated toddler. The more they get, the more they want. Hell, isn’t that the rule of thumb for most greedy people in your life? You will always have givers and takers, the hardest part in finding a balance that works.

Could that be why I love yoga so much… because it offers balance?

That, and the fact that there's no dog hair to be found?

Peeps, that right thar is gosh darn truth!

L IS FOR LIFE

This meme about LIFE speaks to me personally... about a couple of very specific people.
My personal motto?
'Kill them with success & bury them with a smile!'

THE RIGHT STUFF

Last week, after a generally disheartening and somewhat life changing day, I decided to head to the cottage for dinner. Just like the rain cloud that followed me around for the majority of the day, during my drive from town it started to sprinkle. By the time I got out of the car and to the bottom of the hill, I was in the midst of a full blown downpour. Suffice is to say once I finally unlocked and got through the cottage door my lovely summer wears were pretty much soaked.

Without a second thought, I kicked off my sandals, zoomed through the kitchen, opened the patio door and headed down the stairs to the water. As the rain intensified, I simply closed my eyes and absorbed the moment. Before long, I could feel that not only was I completely relaxed but by now I was also soaked to the bone. You know that vibe? When your makeup's running, whilst the pungent smell of wet dog overpowers the scent of the copious amount of hair product one puts in their hair.

In that very moment, any/all stress and concern disappeared and my overall disposition completely decompressed. Nothing, and I mean nothing (other than maybe one of those perfect hugs that turns into really great sex) has ever offered me such a sheer sense of relaxation like consciously standing in the pouring rain.

Eyes closed, I could hear the pups swimming around me and swear I could feel each and every raindrop landing on me. For a brief moment my mind veered to why I was so glum, then immediately realized the point was moot. In no way, shape or form, was I going to let the bad behaviour of another occupy my good nature nor my loyalty a moment longer. I stood in that rain for more than 20 minutes and the only reason I went up to the cottage was fear I would need to put my phone on rice to dry it out.

Anyway, once I dried off and fed my pups, this image is what I arrived on the dock to find. Trust me when I write, more than a week later, the rainbow was meant to be. Kind of like an affirmation that everything was going to be alright.

Completely unrelated to my mood, the day following my social media post stating 'there's nothing better than standing alone in the pouring rain. It's like a mute button for life,' my boss sympathetically asked me if I was okay. When I assured him I was, I felt the need to add a very important tidbit. 

You know the person the coined the phrase, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger?" I said. "Today I'm honestly thinking they just need a a really good and solid punch in the face!"

We both burst out laughing and I knew in right then & there I'd be just fine.

Enjoy this amazing image and thanks again for listening.

This image is what the beauty of  making the right decision looks like.
TAKEN: JULY 26th, 2017

FECK OFF FISHER-FOE

If I didn't see it, I woudn't have believed it.
TAKEN: DECEMBER 1st, 2016

This afternoon I was sitting in my super sexy beach chair when this dude stumbles out from who the hell knows where. As I watched this supposed ‘professional angler wanna be’ wander to the water, I almost had to look for Aston Kutcher and his film crew from his now defunct show PUNK’d.

...No such luck.

I guess I should clarify that the resort where I am staying boasts being a preserved wildlife area. Birds walk along the pool decks truly uninhibited, iguanas roam the lawns, and the fish are like pets. They are so conditioned to being around people that the fish actually jump out of the water to catch a snippet of food you may be tossing to them; just like a pup with a Frisbee.

As I watched this idiot approach the beach I couldn't help but worry. Not only was the snorkelling area full of swimmers that may take a hook but any fish would surely/enthusiastically grab at his line.

All I could do was watch in disbelief. As I rose from my chair to stop him, a lovely British lady stepped up equally pissed off. As I approached the water I could see her finger wagging which intern had this fisher-foe moving along.

She and I stood and chatted for quite sometime. By the end of our chat, we seemed to both come up with a universal label for this angler chap with absolutely NO common sense.

GOOF! YUP... This Fisher-foe was nothing but a fat hairy goof!

WHO THE HELL KNEW?

In early stages of my electronic journal, I asked a simple question to the Ya Gotta Laugh About It masses (of about 35 readers) which was: do you ever feed an expired parking meter?

It was a quirky post about acquaintances that drift about your life at their leisure, then went on to explain how an acquaintance differs from a friend. Short story long, I ultimately categorized them as parking meters whose egos ultimately need to be fed. 

All of that said, a prior business acquaintance fed my expired meter yesterday. Out of the blue, my phone beeped touting those words that always make me curious... 'howdy stranger!' I smiled because I was perplexed, the number wasn't in my phone, so I immediately googled the area code that appeared on my screen. When the location appeared, I knew it had to be someone I hadn’t spoken to face to face since last summer, nor had a text message from in months. I must admit, not only did it feed my ego, it was a very pleasant surprise.

Pleasant surprise or not, I immediately wondered where the hell they got the cash to feed my meter. When I asked them what was up, they explained I had crossed their mind as they'd traveled to an old supplier we both use to sell for. What ensued next, was a great electronic conversation. Even though I no longer work in the industry, it was like I’d never left. Mission accomplished; my ego had been fed.

At the end of the day he asked about a mutual acquaintance we had. Someone he had met through me in the summer of 2012. It was that very inquiry that made me think of the parking meter post from 2011. I told him where I was at with this acquaintance he all these years later he only had four works in return. “I told you so,” was all I read.

Funny thing is? As acquaintances go, I honestly knew he was right about them in 2012.

Who the hell knew parking meters were so observant... and I,so gullible!

Medford, Wisconsin.. Where I met the industry person that fed my parking meter today.
TAKEN: OCTOBER 2011

W IS FOR WHATEVER

My only regret is carrying crappy "taker" baggage for far too long!

Three years ago last November, I was the girl with the balloons. 

My nest had emptied and I was embarking on a personal journey that I knew would change me to my very core. 

Suffice is to say that I made some much needed and very big life moves. Then, to compliment my new outlook, I started this silly little Blog. As stupid as this reads, yesterday proved to me that the woman of more than three years ago, has officially morphed into a space where she knew she needed to be.

How so? As I looked down at my phone yesterday, I rolled my eyes, injected applicable sound effect, and said only one word. Pffft....WHATEVER!

You see, for the last leg of my journey, I decided that 2015 was going to be dedicated to the "Death of The Taker!” You know the type, they'll only call you when they're in a jam, need something and/or are looking for an ego boost. The even bigger trait of a taker is that they are conspicuously absent whenever you’re in need of them. 

Why is it that people think they can re-enter your life without penalty for treating you poorly? Could it be that they have no clue that they truly have? 

WHATEVER… Nuf said!

Q IS FOR QUESTIONABLE

I’m the first person to put my hands up and admit that I’m not the sharpest tack in the box. That said, I suppose I am grateful that Sharp Tack Quality Control Department let me slip into their proverbial box for being 'just sharp enough'. Hell, I'm no rocket scientist, so I’ll accept whatever grades those white coat quality peeps are handin' out!!

What do I know?
My fur babies don't even listen to me!
TAKEN: MARCH 31, 2015

Giggles aside, for the first time since I started this electronic journal, the one thing I have refused to discuss, have been the months of painfully questionable distance placed between my daughter and myself. All I will say is that based on difficult choices, hard lines were drawn & maintained.

It's only recently that she has made the personal choice (outside of us) to come home. It's only now, that I can tearfully admit that it was my husband and my sons that carried me though all those very difficult months.

Truth? I wasn't silent because I wanted to be,  I was silent because I needed to be. For her: so she could go to the next level in her life without my noise. My heart knew she needed to have this specific life experience, no matter what the outcome.

I'm not gonna lie. The evolution of the relationship I have with my children isn't unlike what I have discovered works within my marriage, which is probably why I have learned to compartmentalize so well. Simply put, I came to the realization that a breath saved, makes the world of difference... in the long run.

Could that be why I write? So that I will always have a voice that is truly my own?

QUESTIONABLE!