Wednesday or Thursday of last week, a coworker asked me if I had anything special planned for my husband for Valentines Day. I simply shrugged my shoulders and quietly mentioned that it's something we've never celebrated. I could tell by the look on their face they were curious, so I told them why. All they could bring themselves to say was that they were sorry. I thanked them for the kind sentiment.
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| My Momma & Me in Gaspe, Quebec TAKEN: JULY 1972 |
I remember it like it was yesterday. It was just past midnight, February 14th, 1987, when the phone rang in my apartment. All my father said was,"your mother's gone." My first reaction was an instant sense of relief; as ALS (more commonly known as Lou Gehrig's Disease) had her suffering for long enough.
My husband and I were only dating when my mother passed but even if we'd never married, I don't believe that I would ever have taken a Valentine other than my Mom. She was stoic in the end. So brave, though I'm sure she had to of been scared. You see, death was something we were never allowed to talk about when she was ill, that's just how she rolled. If I had to describe the last six months of her life, the one word I would chose, would have to be heartbreaking.
At my fathers request, I left a good job in the City the May prior so that I could stay with her through the day. I was a waitress in the evenings that summer (for a bit of spending money) but my father needed round the clock help. Out of sheer necessity, he took a six month leave of absence from his job that September but she still needed the both of us. As you can imagine, that time my father and I spent together, changed our relationship for the rest of his life. Our unconditional support for one and other remained in tact until the day he died.
Anyway, I told my coworker last week that I would write about my mom today, as I had every year since I started this electronic journal. I also mentioned that I suspected that she no longer needed to by my Valentine because she'd been reunited with my Dad.
Having said that, I know there's no written rule that you have to pick and declare only one true love today. So here's hoping you love yours as much as I love mine...As today will always be our day.
Happy Valentine's Day Mom. I miss and love you very much. xoxo
