Z Is For... ZEST

I have always embraced the zest element in my life. What can I say, my favourite colour is red and I truly am a passionate person. I am first to to put up my hand to admit - I work hard, plays hard,  and follow a very simple life platform. 

Laughter is the ignition switch and sarcasm the fuel. I am drawn to like-minded people (particularly if they can keep up with me) and I whole heartily embrace them. Though I can lead blindfolded, I love fun. It's how I roll.

Yesterday I posted that I wish I could have been free to be me. One of my newer readers commented “all those things in the past, made you who you are today” and I realized that she’s absolutely right. I really am simple. I am just simply ME. Great heart, fun loving, amazing dental plan, and a solid inner zest!

April 30th, 2013 - ZEST
Taken: March 30/13

CHEERS & THANKS FOR READING!

I'm kidding (though dental hygiene is key). The truth of the matter is, if you give off that specific "zestful" energy, with the right connection, you will always get it back in spades.

Like mindedness gravitates to like mindedness. Get it? "We have unmistakable like minded ZESTness!" Okay, that was lame.

That right there tells me maybe my word should have been ZERO. Which is the number of posts I have to complete to finish this blogging challenge. 

Oh my goodness I did it. I can't believe it.

I say we pour me a glass of wine! Better yet? How about we give me a great big hug!

Zest or no zest, this exercise was exhausting, and gosh darn it... I have absolutely and unequivocally earned both!!!

I AM Happy... Yet I Have Questions.

Looking back at my posts from this time last year, I know I didn’t have a single ounce of self-esteem; truth of the matter, I hadn’t had any for about the five years previous. I'll admit that I  was reading a lot to understand my situation at hand but I was at a complete loss, and had been for a very long time.

My really great stories are told when I smile with my eyes...

I may have regained my self esteem since but I still have some questions; the last six months tell me I always will.

Seriously? The personal biggie? Does everything happens for a reason?

If that's the case, what was MY reason?

If I am completely honest with myself, part of what's happened to me was due to how the journey with my father ended.  I know that sounds like a bit of a crutch. Yet, when do we really need crutches? We need them to aid us when we are hurting. After the last couple of weeks, it has become apparent that I am still in pain. Which is why I am finally going into grief counselling.

My daughter posted this graphic this morning and I immediately did two things; I saved it to my phone so that I could share it with all of you, and I sent it to a friend. Not because our friendship had some tragic ending; I just wanted to let them know, that no matter how many questions I have, I wouldn't change a single chapter of our story.

At the end of the day, isn't it the really great stories that provide one big happy ending?

What do ya know? Imagine that... Yet another question!

What’s Your Sign Baby? Exit!

I totally answered this question today but that's not the reason for my post.

My friend Tim landed in the hospital unexpectedly this week. Last night my quirky sidekick Colleen and I stopped in after work to say hello. Tim didn’t expect to see us so we didn’t stay long. For the record, he looked like he was feeling, really really crappy! A little blunt? Nah, I know he appreciated our surprise; because let’s face it, I only do good surprises.

To the point of my post. Joking around last evening I asked Sir Tim a question and his response was “I am a Libra.” Thinking the morphine just kicked in I dismissed it. Then I recalled Colleen talking 'signs' earlier in the evening. Chatting on my way home tonight, Tim mentioned his sign yet again. That (combined with the dialogue I had with a bat shit crazy Architect I had to sit next to for dinner a couple of weeks back) got me thinking. Is there really any truth to astrology?

Just like my Dad, I have always read my horoscope. I’m an Aries; and by definition of what RAMS are, I pretty much fit the profile. So I immediately wondered; who am I compatible with and who am I not? I started to dig.

Tim’s a Libra. He’s easy going, fair, creative and a good communicator (it doesn’t mention humour but he’s crazy funny). I see how we get along. Colleen is a Cancer. We’ve always loved the qualities the other possesses and together our synergy makes us the perfect business woman. Keeping that trend in mind, one of the most important people in my life right now is a Capricorn. Their traits are very similar to an Aries. I was shocked. How can it be that we get along? I thought the rule of thumb was that 'opposites attract?' 

Honestly? I don’t care what the stars say and I guess that's because I have a pretty simple personal philosophy. If I want you in my life you’re in it, if I don’t you aren’t.

Direct enough for you? Guess I really am an Aries through and through!

Does Lack of Sleep Breed Indifference?

Last week was brutal for me. Don’t get me wrong; my whirlwind adventure was wicked fun, but when I put my plans in place, I never expected to end up so totally worn out. I honestly can’t remember the last time I’ve been so exhausted.

As young Darren constantly reminds, I’m ‘approaching my senior years', and he’s absolutely right. I am very much a creature of habit, and lack of sleep for me is more painful than not eating or even being really ill. 

Why so exhausted?

I didn’t sleep Wednesday night (anticipation), little sleep Thursday night (event participation), zero shut eye Friday night (Staci situation), so with my bed calling my name last night, I finally got a great night sleep.

To me, the key to being really well rested, is waking up on my own.

You know what I mean, remain horizontal until you hear your inner self announce 'I've had just about enough of this bed for one day'... (THAT is when I start to think about starting my day.) Honestly? I allow myself that specific luxury about once a year.

Being overtired, always makes me over think. Truth be known, when exhausted, I can easily confuse even the sharpest Mensa candidate!

I'm not proud to admit that when I am cranky I focus on the very finite and totally irrelevant detail. I tend to be dismissive, but most of all, distance myself from any interaction with others. As a full blown extrovert, I completely shut down and become (for lack of a better word) indifferent. 

It’s not complicated, it’s like my mind selectively downplays things, so that I don’t have to deal with the reality at hand. History has proven that this is a reflex for me and it automatically kicks in once I begin breathing through my eyelids!!!

Wash. Rinse. Repeat?

The last weekend in June has my BFF flying into YYZ from Whitehorse. We are going to gather with old friends, I’m gonna introduce him to some new peeps, and I know it’ll go nonstop. After the last five days I only have one word of advice for myself.

AMBIEN… I’m thinking if could be the gift that keeps on giving!

“Ah Ha” said my Credit Card to the Shoes!

Have you ever had a defining “Ah Ha” moment? You know the kind where your eyes roll completely around in your head or you slap yourself on the forehead and say “I shoulda had a V8”?

I have, in fact I did, yesterday.

Oh, the instant when the solution to a problem becomes clear feels good. For lack of a better word it’s liberating - even a little therapeutic.

Not proud to admit it but I’d had a problem I wasn’t dealing very well with since the beginning of October. (To the point where this “problem” was preoccupying my thoughts and taking up far too much of my energy.) I was stuck.

Finally, enough was enough. Yesterday I dug in my heels and met with it head on. I got up in the morning, told myself this is how it’s going to be and by the time dinner was served I was kind of smiling on the inside asking myself “why didn’t I do that two months ago…?”

I’m a simple gal. Why do the obvious answers always want to play hide and seek with me? Why can I be smart as a whip one day and dumb as a stump the next? Probably for the same reason there’s a party of fifteen going on in my head and I’m the hostess….

Because life is hard right up until the moment it isn’t!