Sunday, March 13, 2016

APPARENTLY, I HAVE AN ISSUE?

A few months ago I was involved in a labour forecasting meeting where I was introducing a new weekly reporting mechanism I’d designed using Google Docs. In preparing to begin my demonstration, my Goggle+ profile (which you all see when you read here, comment on our Facebook page, or read my Tweets) popped up for me to log into. Without missing a beat, my Boss quickly asked… “What’s with the shades?!”

I vaguely explained that my profile pic's a very symbolic selfie that was taken at a time when I could feel my life changing. It was right around that time I began my electronic journal and as a result it has stayed with me this entire time. That said, I may have told him the story of the day I took the picture but I neglected to tell him that when it comes to me and sunglasses, I may have a wee bit of an issue.

Sporting my newest UV acquisition from last Friday.
TAKEN: MARCH 13th, 2016
If I recall, it started when I was in high school. Like most girls my age, I worked part-time and enjoyed something very exciting called disposable income.

By way of my personality, I knew early on that I would never occupy the proverbial “buy the shoes” lane. Yet, I discovered quickly that without incurring a boat load of expense, a pair of sunglasses could make the most amazing fashion statement. (That, combined with the fact that Corey Hart rocked the Billboard charts with Sunglasses At Night, sealed my 30+ year fate.)

Long story short. I had to scoot into the city last Friday to renew my passport. So, when my mission was accomplished I took it upon myself to do a little shopping. Almost eight hours later, I arrived home with two very small purchases. A new bathing suit and another pair of sunglasses. I could tell when I showed them off to Staccs, she really wasn’t impressed. I explained to her, what I have always believed to be true: some women like shoes but I am magnetically and compulsively attracted to a great concert ticket and sunglasses.

This morning, as I gushed over my new specs, she felt the need to share that she'd spoken of me to her father when I wasn't around. She admitted that when she and her father were in our local grocery store yesterday (that offers optical services) she spied a really neat pair of flashy colourfully tinted reading specs she thought I’d love. She mentioned to her Dad that she thought they should pick them up for me. It was at that point my daughter told me that my husband stopped and turned to her with a matter a fact attitude. “When it comes to sunglasses… Your mother has issues” he said.

I don't want to disclose how many pairs of sun specs I have, except to say that my husband bought me a 5 gallon tote and lid this weekend and mentioned that it may be time to for me to increase my storage.

I told him to use his comical (albeit much needed gesture) for his vintage album collection!!

I am pleased to report his albums have found a very safe haven,

Sun accessory issues my ass!!

Saturday, March 12, 2016

IS IT TIME TO SINK OR SWIM?

Don’t you find it interesting that the majority of our conversations begin with a mention that leads to a discussion about the weather? Perhaps I notice it more than most, because where I come from,  the weather influences everything from your mood to your ability to earn a year round living.

Keeping that in mind, as I was telling my BEF (best electronic friend) how excited I am that spring had sprung, they in turn commented that Muskoka still looked like a frozen tundra. I didn’t want to ask them if they were sniffing glue but I’m not gonna lie, thank goodness I have a filter because that very thought immediately entered my head. Frozen tundra? For crying out loud, the ice is sinking!

So, with that as our carpool chit-chat topic for the ride home, I asked the Sweeny-Meister to pull over so that I could hold up my phone to prove to the electronic naysayer that spring was most certainly here. She did, I clicked away, then immediately sent my pics. Then, when I got home, I downloaded them onto my office hard drive and this particular photo really resonated with me.

This bridge is the prettiest thing left at the old Tamwood Lodge site
 ~ on Lake Muskoka
TAKEN: MARCH 10th, 2016
When I spied this photo, I couldn't help but focus on the bridge. My point was to prove the ice was melting, yet I couldn't help but wonder... 'Is the bridge at her limit, or is she stronger than ever?'

My glass half empty tells me she's cooked. My glass half full has a much different opinion which is probably why I was reflective. 

My glass half full knows what she's been though and that she's fought very hard for herself these last 5 years. In the midst of a lot of change happening, she still remains firmly in place. Can she hang in there and endure the lakes opening one more time? Does she really even want to hang on? Or, would she rather give up and let it all go?

Just like any strong woman, only she knows those answers. For what it's worth, I think she's experienced the worst of what she's been handed & she should hope for the best as the seasons change once again.

Afterall, though she stands alone, she represents the end of a beautiful time in Muskoka.

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

MY BONFIRE BEAUTY

This past Monday morning, the local radio station asked for people to call or post with what their personal telltale sign is that Spring is on it's way. A segment later, the morning guy announced that one fella posted he knows it's Spring because the roads are wet. Then, he immediately followed with a report of a lady posting that she knows it's Spring because her cat gets hyper.

As I prepared to turn on my hair dryer, I stopped in my tracks and burst out laughing. My quick change in demeanor got the attention of my three pups (that were occupying the powder room with me). I looked at them and joked..."Hey, you're looking at a woman with needs here. My cat gets hyper every Spring too!"

How do I get Dottie to pose?
Chicken wieners work every time!
TAKEN: MARCH 5th, 2016
For what it's worth, the dogs didn't think it quite as funny as yours truly and they couldn't figure out why the hell I was laughing hysterically so early in the morn.

Truth is, it was a stellar Monday morning moment after a truly amazing weekend. The weather kept me outside and it was mild enough to have a backyard bonfire late Saturday afternoon.

I love a great bonfire and so do my pups. With Dot aging quickly, I find myself picking certain activities that she enjoys just in case she gets called up to serve as a lifetime memory sooner than later. As you know, all dogs go to heaven, so I know she'll have no shortage to keep her herding instincts keen... Truthfully, it's us I'm really worried about.

As our Saturday afternoon festivities progressed, I posted to Twitter and sent a photo to my favourite electronic friend. It showed her bundled up in her blanket, on her very own Muskoka chair, to keep her  hips off the cold ground and basking our attention. Just look at that face, how could you not want to go out of your way and spoil that girl? Exactly!

As you can tell, more than usual, I will be capturing and hording memories...

After all, that's what we do with those we cherish and unconditionally love... Isn't it? 

Sunday, March 6, 2016

NO HUGS REQUIRED!

Well, this past week signified the week that I would have normally gotten on a plane, had I not already been away the first week of December and am booked to head out again the first week of April. 

This time last year, I had regrets when our American friends headed out of the snow drifts of Wisconsin without us but this year I could have sworn I felt differently. Though I'm genuinely sad that I didn’t wake up this week on a beach in Jamaica (to relax and ring in my girlfriends 40th birthday) I had to be realistic; there's only so much time and less than that left in the budget. Even understanding those two critical factors, from the moment their Facebook page alerted me that they’d boarded their flight, I immediately longed to return, for a third time since 2012, to Jamaica.

As silly as this may read, I realized this past week, that I discovered myself in Negril. When I type that, I should clarify that I don’t care who you are, nothing prepares you for mid-life. Never once did anyone ever warn, nor offer me the proverbial handbook, of what to do with my time and energy once my children moved on. As a result, I quickly found myself lost. Which in turn landed me at a personal crossroads, accompanied by a full blown identity crisis.

You can't visit Jamaica and not land at Rick's Cafe. AMAZING!
TAKEN: MARCH 2nd, 2012

That said, to add salt to my wounded wanderlust this past week, I ended up chatting with a specific friend that was in my inner circle at the time of my fateful trip of self-discovery four years ago. If there's one thing I've realized in hindsight, it’s that when you allow people to see even a hairline crack of discord in your life, human nature has them use that as leverage for their own agenda.

I won’t elaborate any further except to say that once I got home from my 2012 Jamaica trip, it wasn’t long before I closed myself off from their negativity toward me and their opinions about the direction my life may or may not go. I was shocked last week they typed… “Something tells me that you’re never going to let me forget that time.” 

My answer? Abbsa-friggin’-lootley!!

I’ll never forget that very painful time. Matter a fact, I don’t want to forget. If I do, then those exact hairline cracks of negativity and control will slowly reappear. My biggest fear is that they will once again purposefully chip away at my self-confidence, which in hindsight was devastating. 

Bull crap aside... Happy Anniversary, to me. Just like the day I landed at Rick's Cafe in 2012, when it comes to navigating mean people, my mind has arrived where my determination will always be. Hear me roar when I say that I will never return to a place where I allow any person, friend and/or family member to manipulate my thoughts again.

Because let's face it. Any and all of them thar thoughts are exactly that... MINE! 

Sunday, February 28, 2016

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER?

Here it is... The very first picture I posted to Instagram.
TAKEN: FEBRUARY 26th, 2016

In late October, my Boss wandered into my office and told me that he thought the company should have a presence on Instagram. As many of you know, I am a self-declared “social media junkie” so I was immediately a tad embarrassed. When he asked me what was wrong, I shrugged my shoulders and explained that Instagram was the one medium that I’d never ventured into. Without hesitation, he confidently gave me direction. “...Let's get at it!”

The very next day, we dove in head first and each created a personal account. He immediately began to post and share. Then, the following Saturday night I took my phone for a late night swim in the frigid fall water of Orillia Lake. Though I pulled my Blackberry out of the water and gave her mouth to mouth, she never truly recovered. From that point, my phone lost 90% of its functionality including the camera. Meaning, until I decided which phone I would upgrade to, Instagram would have to wait.

Well, I finally bit the bullet last week and bought a new phone, so I started to read and understand just what the hell it is Instagram does. Like anything, some bash it and others love it. I guess my main comment is that I’m just not sure what the hell to do with it.

So, with not a dime in my pocket to buy a clue as to how the the platform works, today I shared my very first Instagram post via iGrann (the posting option for a Blackberry). I'm always brutally honest, so you won't be surprised to read that I had to use Google to help me get it done. I posted what I had to say as a comment (with a typo) and sent it out to amazing 51 people that have followed me from that very first day I registered in hopes that content might eventually follow. 

To keep it simple, I kept my Twitter handle. You see, my Boss didn't use Twitter before I arrived and these months later he's really enjoying it. How do I know? He started playfully greeting me when he arrived in the morning using that nickname. Not gonna lie, when I hear... "Good morning @Rhon2theDee" I instantly smile.

Anyway, wish me luck on the Instagram front. Oh... and ANY help or advice on how to navigate the social media beast is truly appreciated.

Sunday, February 21, 2016

LEAF IT TO ME TO PONDER...

Is the leaf lonely... Or simply determined?
TAKEN: FEBRUARY 20th. 2016
I was awoken yesterday morning by my daughter asking if there was an umbrella handy. In a haze, told her where she could find one but wondered what the hell she needed one for.

When I pulled the window blinds, I realized that it was pissing down rain outside. (Never, in all my years, do I remember it pouring rain on the 20th of February.)

As I looked through the massive rain drops that covered my bedroom window, I discovered a site that I could completely relate to. It was a single maple leaf, on the biggest tree in the yard, hanging on for dear life. It instantly made me smile. Not only for its endurance but with my own anticipation of an early spring.

As I stood at my bedroom window, admiring my newest friend, I grabbed my phone to take a picture. When I got to my desk, I realized I hadn’t done the wee chap justice. So, I grabbed my Nikon, threw on my rubber books and bolted outside into the rain. For whatever reason, I stood there looking up and embraced the ice pellets hitting my face.

As you know, I speak openly here about Seasonal Affective Disorder. Looking up at that leaf I realized that's exactly how I cope with the darkness of winter. Alone, and at times feeling as though I am barely hanging on.

So, you can imagine my delight when Friday morning, as I walked to meet the Sweeney-meister, the sun was up; a first. That small sign of light tells me that the end is getting closer, I can feel it. Though the last couple of months have been a tad long and at times lonely, I sense that spring will bring some new and exciting things. As I do every year, I’ll be glad to rekindle old friendships, as well as discover a few new ones.

Yup, for the first time yesterday morning, I reaffirmed a couple of very important things. My last months of perseverance tells me that I am as strong as the leaf in this picture.

Not sure how else to explain a silly instant connection... to a lone leaf.

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

FROM THE CHEAP SEATS


Boy, I hate to be blind-sided. It doesn’t happen very often but when it does, I always try to truly understand what the hell happened. When hit on the blind side, I immediately ask myself these two questions. Do I stand up for myself and explain? Or, do I take it up the ying-yang and file away the specifics (in this instance, discovering someone's two faced) for future reference? Friday, to ultimately keep the peace, I chose the latter. 

Not gonna lie, the entire incident still has me frazzled. My metaphoric ying-yang took it so bad, that it reminded me of the joke of the old farmer and his wife. You know the one, where he's telling all the other farmers what a romantic guy he can be. Boasting to be such a generous lover that he always utters those three special words to his wife before he makes love to her. His loving words were always... “Brace yourself Gertie!”

Yup, I was poor Gert last Friday and there wasn’t a tube of lube anywhere in sight. The official result of a two-faced blindside. The monster that had roared at me 24 hours earlier, was no longer the bully but the victim. I never saw it coming but reading their words showed me their experience of being in our exact scenario. 

Still brewing from the fact that I folded like a lawnchair, I was stuck. So I sent a BBM message to my buddy A-Rod this afternoon is search of a bit of a reality check. I knew by reaching out, my tale of two faces would not land on deaf ears, and he'd tell me if I was being an idiot. (You see, he takes the gold medal for having dealt with the village idiot for years, so I truly value his opinion.) 

As expected, by the time I left to go home today he’d helped me see the light. Which is that an idiot can’t help themselves. They ultimately have an overwhelming amount of IDIOT in their overall genetic make up. In a nutshell, an idiot is who they are and what they will always remain.

Rhondi Rule #782: Never argue with an idiot. They'll just lower you down to their level, then beat you with experience! 

Truth? Not following my exact advice last Thursday morning is why I was blind-sided.

...Sucks to be right!

Sunday, February 14, 2016

MY ONE AND ONLY VALENTINE

Wednesday or Thursday of last week, a coworker asked me if I had anything special planned for my husband for Valentines Day. I simply shrugged my shoulders and quietly mentioned that it's something we've never celebrated. I could tell by the look on their face they were curious, so I told them why. All they could bring themselves to say was that they were sorry. I thanked them for the kind sentiment.

My Momma & Me in Gaspe, Quebec
TAKEN: JULY 1972
I remember it like it was yesterday. It was just past midnight, February 14th, 1987, when the phone rang in my apartment. All my father said was,"your mother's gone." My first reaction was an instant sense of relief; as ALS (more commonly known as Lou Gehrig's Disease) had her suffering for long enough. 

My husband and I were only dating when my mother passed but even if we'd never married, I don't believe that I would ever have taken a Valentine other than my Mom. She was stoic in the end. So brave, though I'm sure she had to of been scared. You see, death was something we were never allowed to talk about when she was ill, that's just how she rolled. If I had to describe the last six months of her life, the one word I would chose, would have to be heartbreaking. 

At my fathers request, I left a good job in the City the May prior so that I could stay with her through the day. I was a waitress in the evenings that summer (for a bit of spending money) but my father needed round the clock help. Out of sheer necessity, he took a six month leave of absence from his job that September but she still needed the both of us. As you can imagine, that time my father and I spent together, changed our relationship for the rest of his life. Our unconditional support for one and other remained in tact until the day he died.

Anyway, I told my coworker last week that I would write about my mom today, as I had every year since I started this electronic journal. I also mentioned that I suspected that she no longer needed to by my Valentine because she'd been reunited with my Dad. 

Having said that, I know there's no written rule that you have to pick and declare only one true love today. So here's hoping you love yours as much as I love mine...As today will always be our day.

Happy Valentine's Day Mom. I miss and love you very much. xoxo

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

PASS MY PILLOW & AN HTMI CORD!

This past February 1st, I playfully greeted the day by welcoming all of my electronic friends to the shortest/longest month of the year. I found the post to be an exceptionally witty snippet when originally shared, until today. The aforementioned longest part, steamrolled any short comings the month may genuinely provide. 

I'm not quite sure why I'm feeling so lethargic. I am getting lots of sleep and working hard at keeping a well balanced diet. Not to mention that for the first time in the better part of a decade, I'm not even remotely stir crazy.

Could it be me? That no matter what life choices I make, I just naturally want to hibernate? You know ... Hibernate:(verb)
When one hunkers down in the bedroom closet, peacefully wrapped in a blanket, the entire month of February. My more specific version also paraphrases the streaming Sex & The City (while in said closet) as much as possible. 

Definitions of what the hell is happening to me aside, I realized today that I am totally over this stupid month. I guess you could say, it's the 10th and I'm spent. As I wallow in a post of self pity, I completely blame the shortest/longest month for this rant. I really thought when we'd had a green Christmas, I would sail though the months that followed with some grace. Apparently, today has proven that's not an option.

I'm tired, I'm cranky, and as much as the voices in my head tell me not to... I am heading upstairs to find a bag of potato chips to ease my angst. Hmmm, maybe I should add a provision for 'snackage' to my above definition.

Is this how you spell guacamole?  Never mind. Chip dip will fill the bill perfectly.

Thanks again for listening. Oh, and Season 4, Episode 4 starts streaming at 8!

Just sayin'.