Thursday, April 17, 2025

O IS FOR ORANJESTAD

Driving past the Malecon boardwalk
in downtown Oranjestad, Aruba.
TAKEN: APRIL 13th, 2025

During my recent visit to Aruba, I travelled through their capital of Oranjestad four times. In all expereinces, the downtown traffic was horrendous.

That said, as the lightbulb for the letter 'O' went off in my head, I was on a coach bus headed to the airport to fly home. This was the only photo I snapped. 

Our week away was so jampacked that working on the challenge took a back seat. As I planned to catch up on my writing on the plane, as I traveled to the airport I began to go through my up coming words in my head. 

This one, specifically, has always been a challenge, and usually signifies when the onset of writers block sets in. How I couldn't have thought of this word in advance makes me scratch my head. perhaps a simple single of how my overthinking begins.

Anyway, this bustling harbour city feels a tad over developed. When traveling east to west, if feels like you're grains of sand going through an hourglass. Two lane traffic where tens of thousand get off cruise ships to browse luxury retailers, and traffic slowly creeps through the city center.

Don't get me wrong, we had an amazing time, but won't be returning. Not because of the expense, or traffic in Oranjestad - but because of the airport.

It was the most painful I have ever had to navigate... and believe me, I have navigated a few!

Wednesday, April 16, 2025

N IS FOR NEIGHBOURS

 

Our lovely neighbour texting me
a snowy photo of our home.
TAKEN: November 23, 2022

I read somewhere that great neighbours make ordinary communities extraordinary, and I tend to agree.

When we were first married, we married in June and my father offered for us to live rent free in his town home for two years to save money. 

We moved in the following month, then he decided to move in with us in November; we bought our first home the following month.

Though we bought the house across the street, we lived in the most amazing neighbourhood. I could visit with my Dad daily, and the kids were constantly in and out of his home. As a matter a fact, every single door was open and welcoming - as was our to them. 

They say it takes a village to raise a child but in our case, our Toronto Street neighbourhood helped raise our three.

Funny how a single word sparks so many memories.

We moved from that home in 2002 and to this day... I still miss it.

Tuesday, April 15, 2025

M IS FOR MEANINGFUL

 

My meaningful tradition.
TAKEN: APRIL 2025
Palm Beach, Aruba


Well, I am back home and trying to play catch up. I started posting whilst I was away but the sun and the sand convinced me that there was a bigger plan in place.

As I celebrated my 29th birthday (for the 31st time) I would have been remiss, if I didn't pack one of my treasured glasses, so that on my day, I could celebrate and have a drink with my Dad.

For those new to reading, I have been collecting the Petro-Canada vintage Olympic glasses (as shown above) for the better part of twenty years. I have travelled about a radius of approximately 180 miles, and searched every thrift store, garage sale, and online buy and sell site to collect more than 220 of them.

When I was staging my photo shoot in the beach, I could spy people watching me. As I returned to our palapa, I had one lady ask me, 'are you going to drink that?'

Ï simply laughed and explained that whenever or where ever I travel, I pack one of these beauties in bubble wrap, so that my Dad travels with me in spirit. Suffice it to say, I think he would have loved absolutely everything about Aruba.

Now, I know there are some folks out there that may think the glass collecting obsession is silly, but it doesn't faze me. 

Instead, if I could offer one vantage point of logic to their negativity it's that what they don’t know is, in the very minute I hold one of these new to me special treasures in my hand, I'm in a wonderful moment with my Dad. 

Today, on the beach, I could hear his laughter as he rattled the ice cubes in his glass, signifying it was empty and that he was ready for a refill.

Keeping his memory alive is very meaningful to me... and there's nothing even remotely silly about that.

Monday, April 14, 2025

L IS FOR LIGHTHOUSE

My Travel Buddy Hubby
at the California Lighthouse
(on Northwestern tip of Aruba)
TAKEN: APRIL 11th, 2025

 

Drone shot highlighting the
Sasariwichi dunes. Breathtaking!
(c) Wikipedia
Taken prior to the 2016 - 2017
restoration of the lighthouse.



Saturday, April 12, 2025

K IS FOR KINDRED

 
Our kindred sisters...
TAKEN: MARCH 7th, 2023

This is Miya (on the left) and Katie Kate (on the right). Sisters born eighteen months apart to the same Mum and different fathers.

Miya came to us via a CKC breeder once we discovered that our 10 year old yellow named Puddin' was full of cancer. After Puddin' passed, I was so lost without her, that I called my breeder to get on the list for another yellow. 

Well, that call came less than six months later. Now, we could have passed and waited for Minnie's next litter, but she had gone into distress and an emergency section had to be performed to save her nine pups.

The breeder instantly decided to have a full hysterotomy done, deeming Minnie sterile. If we wanted a sister to this black beauty, we had to buy a pup from the nine that were birthed on December 5th, 2022.

From the moment Katie came home, these two were inseparable and the best of friends. Our older girl, a flat-coated retriever named Annie, welcomed her as well and The Oreo Gang was back together just over six months since Puddin' died.

With Annie leaving us last September after a short battle with brain cancer, these two became even closer.

I say that they are kindred sisters, but it's more than that. The two of them, along with my travel buddy hubby and I, are all kindred spirits.  

Unconditionally connected for as long as we have time together on earth.

Friday, April 11, 2025

J IS FOR JUSTICE

My beautiful friend
Ashley Milne
Gone but never forgotten!
(c) The Toronto Star
As my readership knows, my friend and coworker was murdered by her husband on January 23rd, 2023.  He was sentenced for his senseless crime on February 10th, 2025. 

What appears here is is what Toronto Star Court Reporter Betsy Powell wrote after the man I refuse to mention by name was sentenced to life in prison, with no eligibility for parole for 20 years. 

For those that have followed my journey - do you really think this is justice for Ashley?

I do not... But at least now we can begin to heal.

Firefighter gets life for murder of wife Ashley Milnes Schwalm, which he staged to look like a fiery crash near a Collingwood ski hill.

Written by: Betsy Powell
Courts Reporter - Toronto Star
Betsy is a reporter with the crime, courts and justice team at the Star

BARRIE, Ont.—A former Brampton firefighter who killed his wife in their Collingwood home and tried to make it look like she died in a fiery car crash was sentenced to life imprisonment Monday without parole eligibility for 20 years.

Forty-year-old James Schwalm pleaded guilty to second-degree murder last June, admitting that he strangled Ashley Milnes Schwalm, 40 — with their two young children nearby in their bedrooms — sometime during the night of Jan. 25, 2023.

The killing of Ashley Schwalm was not spontaneous on Mr. Schwalm’s part. He did not act in the heat of the moment. He did not act in circumstances where his ability to reason was impaired. To the contrary, Mr. Schwalm had resolved to do what would make him happy. And what would make him happy was to excise his wife from his life, by taking hers,” Justice Michelle Fuerst said Monday, reading her scathing reasons for the sentence.

“There would be no alimony to be paid, no assets to be divided, no financial loss to bear, no impediment to leading the happy life to which he felt himself entitled.”

Fuerst said: “This was a case of intimate partner violence of the most extreme kind.”

The sole issue for the judge to decide was when Schwalm should be first eligible to apply for parole, as a conviction of second-degree murder carries an automatic life sentence. The Crown asked for a period of between 20 and 21 years; while the defence recommended he serve between 13 and 14 years in prison before being eligible to apply for release.

The judge said that despite Schwalm’s guilty plea — and the fact he had no prior record — the evidence of planning and deliberation made the case close to a first-degree murder, which was his original charge. (First-degree murder carries an automatic ineligibility period of the maximum 25 years.)

When the judge told the court she was imposing a parole eligibility period of 20 years — which may set a legal precedent in Canada for intimate partner homicide — Ashley’s close friend, Christan Bosley, leaned forward and placed her hand on the shoulder of Lindsay Milnes, one of Ashley’s two sisters, who sobbed quietly. 

During the hour-long hearing Monday, Schwalm sat stone-faced, facing the judge, not once glancing at his late wife’s loved ones sitting in the body of the court.

Fuerst reviewed the evidence against Schwalm.

As Ashley’s final hours counted down, she noted he attempted to implicate his wife of a decade in making arrangements for her own death, by asking her to buy gasoline for the snowblower that he used to dispose of her body, the judge noted.

After strangling her in the family home — “an especially cruel” way to end someone’s life, Fuerst said — he dressed her in hiking clothes, put her dead body inside their Mitsubishi Outlander and drove to the ski hills where they shared decades of memories and had exchanged vows. He poured gasoline throughout the interior and then drove it off the side of a road, using a lighter with his initials to set it ablaze.

In the days leading up to her death, Schwalm sought advice on Google about alimony and asked if an iPhone’s search history could be seen once deleted. He’d also asked a doctor at a social gathering if snapping someone’s neck would kill them, and told a friend he was concerned about the financial consequences of divorce.

Schwalm had a $1-million life insurance policy naming him as the sole beneficiary in the event of his wife’s death.

Schwalm also provided police with footage — and a map — of his purported dog-walking route that morning. However, when police checked surveillance cameras in the neighbourhood, they found no sign of him and concluded he had “deliberately manufactured” the footage of him leaving the house. He also literally failed to cover his tracks. A passerby who saw the burning car in a ditch took photos of footprints in the snow leading from the driver’s door.

In the days following the murder, the Collingwood community rallied around the “distraught” first responder, sending flowers, food and messages of condolences.

Ashley’s family believe Schwalm killed his wife because she planned to leave him after tolerating years of his controlling behaviour, which escalated in the last year of marriage when she had a brief affair with her boss.

Scores of women are killed by their intimate partners each year in Canada. Records of nearly 400 Ontario cases since 2003 show that two-thirds of intimate-partner homicides happen after a relationship has ended or is about to fall apart.

Schwalm will have no guarantee of parole upon his first eligibility date, nor ever.

The judge agreed to the prosecutor’s recommendation that Schwalm have no contact with his children until they are 18.