PROCESSING PUPPY LOVE

Annie arrived back at the cottage
Thursday September 19th. 
TAKEN: SEPTEMBER 21st, 2024

As I sit and stare at my screen of the photo I snapped of my two beautiful girls, together again, I just can't seem to find the words. I still haven't fully processed that my amazing Annie left us so soon. 

Who knew when I took her up the hill at the cottage to see Dr. Robyn on September 3rd, that she would be gone two days later.

The only thing that is helping my heart start to heal, is that her suffering was short lived. And, that I wasn't unreasonable in making the swift decision to let her go. Doing it while she was already sedated for her throat scope was the best choice that I could have made for her.

To compound my lingering emotions, last Thursday when I went to pick her up and brought her down the hill to spend the rest of the season with me at the cottage, I was teary eyed to find sympathy card signed by everyone at the Trillium Lakes Animal Hospital. 

"Annie was such a wonderful girl," Dr. Robyn wrote. "I am so sorry we couldn't do more for her." ...Her and me both.

When you have a strong bond with an animal, it feels like a part of you leaves with them when they leave you. This loss, has been by far the most difficult pet loss to process. She went everywhere with me, and was never more than a couple of feet from me at all times. 

As I continually reflect, our Puddin' lived comfortably with cancer for a couple of years. Annie lived uncomfortably for a week. Though I was extremely heart broken when Puddin' parted, I was given time to accept her fate was looming. 

Along with the shock of all of this, it has also impacted what remains of version two of the Oreo Gang. Though they seem to have finally settled into there own as a pack of two these last couple of weeks, they definitely looked for Annie at length.

Anyway, as we move forward with an energetic 3 year old black lab with an old soul,  and super speedy hyper-manic 20 month old yellow lab, version three of the Oreo Gang's definitely something that won't be entertained for a couple of years.

Oh, don't get me wrong, fearing the worst I called our wonderful breeder the day I brought Annie up the hill and her advice definitely resonated. "If you get another one right away", she cautioned. "They will all be passing along at the same time."

...And I simply don't think my heart could ever take a gigantic impact like that.

REST EASY MY ANNIE

As clear as day, I remember the exact moment we found our beautiful Annie. I was sitting on the balcony watching the sunset in a resort in La Romana, when I received a Facebook alert for puppies for sale.

Once back in Muskoka, we discovered that she was only five weeks old and too young to leave her mama. The owner was adamant, “we have to get them out of here, they are keeping us up at night.” My husband immediately scooped her up; and got her the hell out of dodge.

The price for her freedom? A mere $40.00. To this day, it has been the best forty bucks we have ever spent!

Anyway, once we got her home, we discovered that she was starving. She was unable to lap nor eat soften food properly, so we stayed up with her round the clock. In those first 36 hours, I swear she knew we’d saved her life. I also believe she knew she had stolen our hearts.

Well, it was a world wind week that started with a slight head tilt and some drooling, which is why I booked her in to see Dr. Robyn. 

Though she could find nothing conclusive, we decided to try a round of anti-inflammatory medication for a sore neck. Reacting physically after her second dose, she endured the long weekend in steady decline. 

I returned panicked the following Tuesday, which had us progress to full blood work (that was also inconclusive). Returning to the vet Wednesday, we decided to try anti-nausea medicine with no result. 

Then, Annie's inability to eat to eat or drink led us to do a sedated throat scope Thursday afternoon in search of a blockage. While she was under, we made the difficult decision to euthanize her.  

You see, the reason she was no longer eating or drinking was because the vet felt she no longer knew how to. Her extremely aggressive brain tumor had stolen her from us in a mere seven days.

Though I know we made the right decision, it doesn't make the pain any less bearable. Truth is I am somewhat lost, definitely distraught, and my heart aches to the point where I am still having trouble sleeping.

I guess I just have to keep telling myself, though her death ended her time with me, it will never change our strong bond and very special relationship. 

Take a load off, Annie. Rest and sleep easy my beautiful girl.

I loved you your entire life, and will love and cherish you for the rest of mine.